whoopdy woo

Sure, we won the Olympic gold medal in hockey.
Yet one thing struck me as I was walking the streets after the victory (I was on the bus for the last half of the game, so you can understand when I say I wasn't in the mood): on New Years Eve, everyone screams "Happy New Year!!", on Christmas morning everyone screams "Merry Christmas!", yet when Canada wins the goal - all we can do is stick our heads out the window and scream, which is something I've never really understood.

The Canadian hockey term certainly doesn't make me a proud Canadian, because that makes little to no sense when you think about it. The only reason people stick their heads out the window on those certain days is because they're merely excited they were born in the country that acquires men and women who skate well.

Being Canadian has nothing to do with people on ice.

As usual, to bring some more clarity to the situation, here's George:

hook ups

I read a really interesting article in the Globe and Mail yesterday.

It was an excellent article, and a surprising one considering the usual prudence of the Globe. The article was all about how there is a lot of sex going on between athletes during the Olympics. I thought to myself,

"Hell yeah!"

For whatever reason, it never really occurred to me that these people may actually be attracted to one another. Maybe because (like many) I've always perceived athletes as these robotic units that have a single purpose and nothing else: to compete to the best of their ability. But, if you think about it hard enough, there is no better scenario for the worlds biggest hook-up-fest.

Think about it! Thousands of gorgeous, fit, flexible,young, taught athletes, all in the same city at once? Shit, that sounds about right to me. And why not? Athletes get turned on just like everybody else, if not more. If it's not from all the endorphins from exercising so much, it's probably from watching guys and girls walking around in tight-ass spandex. Apparently it happens more in the second half of the games, when most of the competitors have finished their events, are done stressing out, and are just looking to burn off a couple before going home.
I also bet that certain events spawn more sex that others.
Such as, ohhh, gymnastics? (as seen in exhibit A)

exhibit A.

You'd be a damn fool not to.
I also wonder if there's ever been any huge sex scandals throughout Olympic history. I'll give you an example.
For those of you who may not know who Michael Phelps is, you've probably been extradited to an overseas prisoner of war camp. Phelps has currently earned six gold medals in swimming this summer, with two more events on the way, and needs to be stopped.
I wonder if there are any sex-related plans of sabotage in the works to put an end to Phelps' winning streak. Is it totally unrealistic to stage a sexual encounter with a cute little Swedish number, who could either inject Phelps with steroids (stripping him of all his medals), or cause some other form of damage? Maybe the girl could cramp up his feet. You know that feeling you get when you're swimming for too long and your foot cramps up? Ah, that probably wouldn't work. He'd probably hit her with all of his gold medals, which he probably hangs from his boner.

Either way, it was an excellent article. I'm sure it's on The Globe's website.